YoYOYoYOyO
6.7.07

The past couple of weeks have been a real struggle for me, well, relatively speaking. I know we are all struggling in some way. Yeah, yeah, we will have good/up days and bad/down days for the rest of our lives. But that has very different implications for those of us who are bipolar. Fast and slow, up and down. I've been on a seesaw for days upon end. A yo-yo effect on the mood.

The end of the school year - around which my work and son's life revolves - has been very tricky to manage and I am feeling somewhat frayed. Work has been full of writing deadlines. My son's school has been scheduled by someone who is either currently manic or has no sensitivity to people who are - bbq's, picnics, beach days, field day - bring a main dish, a side dish, an empty dish - you name it, it's happening.

Shifting from each of these tasks to another feels like going from first to fourth gear and then back again. Fast and slow. Speed up to pass and then brake again. I feel like I have to stay in that fast lane to keep up with life, but that my heels are dragging on the road. I'm not sure what is up with these car metaphors, but they seem to fit.

I guess I am just treading water, folks. Head above, breathing, floating, fighting. Like a battleship (p.s. did anyone like that song?).